since very long ago..
my wish was not to grow up..
till today i still hoping for it..
but it something that won't come true..

this the 4 months i'm in icu.
i like the workload now..
i like the extra knowledge i'm gaining.
but i don't like how the staff is being treated and the way my colleuge treated one another.

i still remember when i'm still in GW- everyone is good to everyone, no back stab, no so much of 1 gang here 1 gang there..
all diff country ppl work peacefully together with joy and laughter despite the heavy workload..

but now it so so much diff...
i have to been careful with my words when i talk..
i have to be as independant despite knowing very little stuff..
i have no power to voice out to anyone..
and i felt that it a pathetic state..
but wat to do............ i can nv go back to the past..
i have to move forward and face everything and anything positively..
it will be very tiring in long run..
becuz all i wan is to do watever i'm responsible for and be happy.. no fight and etc..
but now!!! for my benefit... i have to start to change myself to adapt into the complicated world..

have to learn to be more confident
have to learn to be more fake
have to learn to be more strong
have to be more knowledgable..
last but not least: have to learn to serve all staffs well

with all this have, i tink i will be surviving very well
but the problem is that will i be happy???

under 3 functional nursing supervisor??
and everyone in the ward scare of them instead of respecting them
without much empowerment
i saw a very dark life for myself in te future!!

hope that i can change the situation.. i pray!!!

after toking abt my work.. here come my relationship

my bro and i starts to tok more..
isit becuz i grow up liao ma??€
lol.. but it a good news...

while my mother and i still the same lor..
haha.. but i have to learn to be more patience with her..
becuz not sure y but she now tends to nag more thn in the past, plus my attention span on her become shorter and shorter as years go by..

Alvin and i:
can i say that we are still the same, but now more of like lao fu lao qi liao le.
becuz we only tok prn and when i wan to have listening ear..
he has been so so so busy with his current work..
while my shift work make the whole situation worse..
becuz we might end up not mitting for 1-2 weeks..
isit normal? i'm not sure..
but i know that we still do love each other, that for sure!!!

i'm currently very active in exercising.
becuz i really hope that i won't continue to put on any more weight..
lol.... jia you!!!
i really wants to learn lotz of stuff.. will list down the things i wanna to learn.

anyway.. no matter wat happen.. life goes on and on..